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Tuesday, February 01, 2011

Jesus Wields A Mean Wife Paddle

Stephen Green
National Director
Christian Voice

Dear Mr. Green,

It's heartening to learn that Christian communities across the pond are preaching the same kind of hate-the-homosexualist theology we practice here in the states. It's just another piece of evidence that even though Jesus is an American, His Holy Word is universal.

I have to admit, however, that we may be a little behind you Brits when it comes to Christ-based violence. Our Dr. Dobson may proudly flog his dachshund, but you, apparently, take it a step further by viciously beating your wife. At least that's what she says in an interview with the Daily Mail:
Caroline Green was often punished by her husband Stephen for failing to be a dutiful, compliant wife, but his final act of violence against her — the one that prompted her long-overdue decision to divorce him — was all the more chilling because it was coldly premeditated.

Stephen Green wrote a list of his wife’s ­failings then described the weapon he would make to beat her with.

‘He told me he’d make a piece of wood into a sort of witch’s broom and hit me with it, which he did,’ she recalls, her voice tentative and quiet. ‘He hit me until I bled. I was terrified. I can still remember the pain…’
If you'd indulge me, I'd like to learn a little more about this weapon you compelled your wife to build. Was it shaped in the form of the cross upon which our deal Lord and Savior was crucified?

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot