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Thursday, September 30, 2010

Bullying as Positive Peer Pressure

Mike Cox
Attorney General
State of Michigan

Dear Mr. Cox,

You're in a tough spot. Tuesday night, CNN's Anderson Cooper interviewed one of your assistant AGs, Andrew Shirvell, and exposed him as a vicious cyber-bully. It was a brutal interview. Shirvell came out of it looking like an obsessive, evil, petty, malicious little weasel, the kind of guy people instinctively hate the minute they see him. It's no wonder you are being buried with demands to fire him.

As Attorney General, you've made cyber-bullying a major priority. Yet, you refuse to fire Shirvell. As a fellow anti-homosexualist activist, I understand your reluctance to do so. Shirvell's bullying is simply an attempt to bring a homosexualist back into Christ's flock. It's something we all secretly celebrate, although we never do so publicly.

Here's what the American Family Association's Ed Vitagliano had to say about it in an interview (about 2:40) with Sam Seder:
Seder: The kid needs some direction, obviously. If the parents have let him be gay, uh, then the kid needs some direction.

Vitigliano: Yeah.

Seder: And I don't mind a little bit of peer pressure if it's in a good way.

Vitigliano: The problem is that you can't publicly say that in the kind of atmosphere we have in the country now.
You should give Ed a call. I'm sure he'll give you good advice.

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot

Elsewhere: Rutgers Freshman Commits Suicide After Students Out Him As Gay.

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9 comments:

  1. Wait--which guy is gay? Was it Armstrong or the Pee Wee Herman/Roy Cohn/self-loathing queen known as Shirvell? Maybe someone should tell him that stalking handsome gay boys is a "tell."

    ++++

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  2. mjs

    You beat me to it. This guy is so deeply closeted he reeks of mothballs. It would interesting to see what a search of his home PC would turn up.

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  3. Big Boppa, all that stuff on his computer is just research. Research, yeah, thats the ticket.

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  4. IT'S TIME TO START BULLYING ANDERSON COOPER!!!!!

    Because he's, well, you know.... A goddamn liberal!

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  5. You might wonder how this clown got a job in the AG's office. The General hit it right on the head. He shares Mike Cox's (heh, heh, I just said "Cox") views on homosexuality RIGHT DOWN THE LINE. Fuck these fucking fuckers, as I so often opine.

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  6. So this man is a Cyber-homoislomocomunofascist? That's it, we're beaten. We might as well move to Canadia.

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  7. No don't move to Cangaydia! They let the homosexualists get married to each other up here. Move to Mexico instead. Except stay outta Mexico City because they let the homosexualists.... well, you know. I think the governmentless libertarian paradise of Somalia is the place for all right-thinking conservatives to go.

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  8. General, Sir:

    It appears that Mr. Shirvelledpecker has gone off on sabbatical or somesuch thing to spend more time researching at a Minneapolis airport restroom or various NotTittyBars.

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  9. Let them have pink triangles!!!

    ReplyDelete

We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.